Monday, January 31, 2011

The Weirdo's, AKA. Dinner with the Schmucks

You know how excited you get the moment when you realize that your little circle of friends is expanding?

As in new people WANT to hang out with you and your friends?

And then it actually happens...

Only to realize that your dinner party turned into Dinner for Schmucks.

With you and your hubby being the leading Schmucks?

Um, yeah.

As in your hubby walks around with his hand up the back of your shirt all night long and insists upon moving his mouth everytime you start speaking?

Or worse, your husband decides to show off is Techterpieces, also known as the mountain of computers that he has lovingly repaired and restored to new life?

Not that this has ever happened to me.

Just that "someone I know" had something like this happen to her....


A "friend of mine"....

She had people over.

And then she and her husband turned into THE WEIRDO'S.

Showing off their inate skill of hosting a dinner party.

The highlights included:

A visit from the plumber.

A vicious baby eating dog.

More cheese than one digestive track should ever have to handle.

1, 2, 3, no FOUR babies crying.  AT ONE TIME.

Saw dust.

Broken chairs.

Cheating cardplayers.

And inappropriate dinner conversation including but not limited to dead people.


Dead People.

Over dinner.

Oh and snappiness.

Followed by awkward pauses.

And a holey sweatshirt.

And a fight to the death.

Or maybe just an argument. 

Or maybe just a debate...

Or maybe just the age old battle of Apple vs. PC.  (or Evil vs. Good, if you are talking in Techy terms.  Not that Techy had anything to do with this.  Remember, this was MY FRIEND, not to be confused with ME)

Oh, and a flying bird. 

Who was worth 20 points, if you could catch him.

And runaway pot holders....

And "Burnt" cookies.

And did I mention the dead people?


We'll (ahem) THEY'll be lucky to ever convince their guests to ever cross their threshold again.

Note: She asked me to post this in apology to her old friends for ruining our their chances of getting new friends to join us them ever again!!


Roberta said...

BOY I wish you had photos to go with this post...lmao

Cortney said...

Are you crazy? I'd love to have an evening with everything mentioned above! Except instead of dead people my family/ friends have the habit of talking about bodily consider yourself lucky.I mean consider your friend lucky.