Thursday, February 3, 2011

My Honest Opinion: Nail polish is not for fingernails

It is my personal opinion that unless you have money to spend on your fingernails, they are ugly.

As in, U-G-L-Y, you ain't got no alibi, YOU UGLY! Ugly.

My opinion is probably a bit tainted by the fact that I have ugly fingernails.

Short, stubby nails, flat nail beds, hang nails on every other finger...
(We won't go into the fact that they are this way because I chew them...not gonna do it!)

Pretty sure that George Costanza had better hands than me.

Well, before the incident, he had better hands than me....

Let's sing it again, shall we?

U-G-L-Y, you ain't got no alibi, you UGLY!!!!  You, you, you UGLY!!!!

If it weren't for the fact that my hands are so tiny, they could easily be mistaken for man-hands.

Random thought.

What if my nickname were "Man-hands Leah"????


Does that sound perverted to anyone else?


Just me?

Sounds about right.

Me being the only one with my mind in the gutter...

Pretty much an every day thing for me.

So yeah, back to the man-hands....

That's what she said!


Sorry...I go there...

But as actual proof for the ugly man hands....

If it weren't for the diamond, you wouldn't know which was which would you?

And because these girls ain't that pretty, I don't usually bother to dress them up with nail polish.

Because really, a little paint ain't gonna help this old barn....

Toes, on the other hand are what I consider sexy.

Not other people's toes, mind you.

Just mine.

I'm vain like that.

For instance, in this pic

Sure there is a book in my hand...

But in reality, rather than reading a book, I was more than likely sitting there staring at my toes and thinking what gorgeous feet I have.

Sorry.  I realize that some of you are now gagging.

Especially those of you who hate feet in general.

But I love my feet.

Almost as much as Ceej loves her hair. 

Which leads me to the question, have you ever asked someone what their best feature was and had them reply "My feet...?"  Or better yet, "My Toes"

Well, now I have changed all that for you....

Glad to be a part of changing your life.

You may ask what the point of all this is?

I'm so glad you asked.

But I honestly have no idea.

I think it may have something to do with the fact that the nail polish on my pretty toes is fading again, due to this blasted sock season that just won't quit.

Mostly, thought, I am just going to blame it on the fact that I get to give my random opinions every Thursday...and this just happened to be today's opinion...

Aren't you lucky? 

Ugly Man Hands and Sexy Feet.

Sounds like an E-harmony match gone RIGHT!

Well, if we dropped the "ugly".

Man Hands and Sexy Feet.

Ah, I love romance.

And fingernail polish.

And sexy toes.

Which reminds me, I have some work to do before tomorrow's weigh-in...

Can't have ugly feet on the scale!

See ya!

(Note: Please don't click, "Unfollow" - wait is that even a button? or a word for that matter? UN-Follow???? Anyone???)


Ang said...

Did somebody give you caffeinated coffee today? LOL
Love it, I totally agree about nail polish for fingers..pointless...
And sorry to say, I am not a fan of feet...AT.All...but cheers to you for loving yours :o)

Debbie Lovette said...

How in the world did I happen to miss your most important post of the year?? I'M into feet. And, Leah, although your feet might be kinda cute, mine are absolutely divine! I, too, have man hands. But, don't even try to compete with my model worthy feet. Just sayin'