Monday, April 11, 2011

Botox Beauty

I want it.

I admit.


This is a much less shameful statement than the next admission I am about to make....

Yes.  I promise.

Wait for it...

I watch the Housewives of ________________ (that blank can be filled with anything BUT Atlanta - ugh)

And these ladies have convinced me.

I want Botox and I want it now.

Actually, they have convinced me that I NEED it and I NEED it now.

Not convinced?

I submit to you...

Exhibit A: ME

Credit: This amazingly glamorous picture was taken with my cell phone.  NICEEEEEEEE.

Age: 30 Years and 8 Days

Complexion: Tire tracks around the eyes, freckles {ahem, baby age spots} EVERYWHERE despite all the sunscreen in the world!, and the forehead wrinkles for added effect.  They add alot, huh????

Overall Complexion Age: I-no-longer-get-carded-EVER-must-be-pretty-bad-45ish.

Exhibit B: Gretchen Rossi. 

Age: 33 Years. 

Complexion: FLAWLESS

Complexion Age: Um, Now that you have graduated high-school, where are you going to college?

Exhibit C: Alexis Bellino 

Age : 34 Years 

Complexion: FLAWLESS 

Overall Complexion Age: Can I buy you a drink, Miss 21st birthday?


Note to self: one should not watch HW of OC while you are feeling OLD.  This leads to feeling older and looking more hagard due to the facial sagging that comes with feeling older....

Note to self: Botox commercials would be BRILLIANT and make millions if they aired during the HW of OC marathons....  I should pitch this to someone....  Maybe then I could afford Botox....

Based on this information, I now realize that Botox probably should have made it to my birthday list.

And finally, based on this information, should you happen to see a Groupon for 1/2 price Botox, you should probably call me IMMEDIATELY.


Ang said...

If it makes you feel better...that last one looks like she's 40 something with a lot of work done...and btw...those photos are majorly retouched, so really there's no comparison..I feel you though...I could use some botox and a tummy tuck

Rachel said...

Oh, sadness, this is a little too late...just saw a DC Groupon 50% off deal for Botox maybe 2 weeks ago!

Emily Troutman said...

I am still REALLY trying to figure out how Alexis had twins..I know what it did to me! I think there's a surrogate she's not talking about out there :)