The Inner Monologue of a Bladder Abused Mommy

I really need to drink my water today.

I think I'll stop and grab one of those Goliath sized McDonalds cups.

Maybe I shouldn't.

Nah, I'll be fine.

I'll be home in plenty of time.

*SLURP*

**SLUUUUUUURP**

Chug, chug, chug, chug.

Little Man: Mommy, I gotta go potty.

Hmmm, me too.

It's ok, just a few more errands.

I can make it.

Hmmmmmmmm

Oooooooooooooooo.

Uh.oh.

Wiggle wiggle wiggle. No.

My bladder is really to weak for this.

Do I have any diapers with me?

Why am I soooooooo far away from home?

If I were wearing a diaper would I actually be willing to go in it?

What is wrong with me?!

Oh, right, 2 babies....

Speaking of babies, did I bring any diapers?

How desperate would you have to be to pee in a diaper?

Ugggggh.

Bounce.

Bounce.

Bounce.

Why did I think it was a good idea to run errands today?

I would stop somewhere, but I'd probably never make it with trying to get my kids out of the car...

Stupid McDonalds.

I'm too young to buy poise pads right?

Waaaaah.

How far are we from home?

2 miles?

Can I make it 2 miles?

This is just sad.

I should know better than this.

I'm so thirsty.

...

Finally. Home.

Why is my driveway so bumpy?

Soooooooo close...

Run!

-People. This happens far too often for my comfort.

Hungry for a day, for a cause

I know what you're thinking.

I'm a diet diva, and as such, I go hungry every day.

But today I'm doing it with purpose.

A purpose that is not an itsy bitsy teenie weenie yellow polka dot bikini.

Allow me to introduce you to H4AD.

An excellent organization that partners with groups fighting hunger and need.

This month, they have partnered with Wellspring Living, who just happens to be headquartered in our own backyard here in the metro Atlanta area.

Wellspring Living provides rehabilitation to girls who have suffered sexual abuse and exploitation.

H4AD's goal this month is to help Wellspring provide grocery expenses for 12 girls for one month. The average cost of grocery expenses is $40 power week per girl.

And if you're a math wiz like me, you know that adds up to $480 per week and $1920 for a 4 week period.

I know you're thinking, so how does this affect me?

I'm getting there, I promise.

Hungry for a Day's mission is not to get you to give $1920, or $480, or even $40, but to have you add up the approximate amount of money out would cost you to eat on the average day, and give that.

No amount is too small and they make it easy for you to get involved.

Just head over to H4AD

and click on the "Go hungry" tab. I'm proud of the work that both of these organizations are doing, I'm so happy to go Hungry 4 A Day!

My Weight Loss Explained

A few weeks ago, after I posted one of my weekly weigh in pics on Instagram, one of my friends commented with the ever notorious, "How are you doing that?" comment.

Which, I'll totally admit, is loaded with all kinds of awesome flattery-ness in the way I read it.

In my head, I read it full of incredulity.

Like I'm magical and using fairy dust as my secret weapon.

Believe me, people, if I had magic weight loss fairy dust, I'd be selling it on the streets of Miami faster than any cocaine bearing drug-lord. EVER.

In reality, my weight loss "success", if you would actually call it that, is related to a healthy dose of self control, a little bit of Jillian Michaels, and yes - technology.

1.  The Self Control.

I know I have said it before.  Probably multiple times, even.

But I am a firm believer in the power of Weight Watchers.

Not really current day, Weight Watchers, though.

I'm not a fan of Points Plus.

I follow the old program.

The one I started using 10 years ago in college.

The one that helped me lose 40 lbs. over my senior year.

HOWEVER...and here's the catch.

I only diet 5 days a week.

EVER.

I figure, I am much less tempted by a brownie on Tuesday, when I know that if I make it to Saturday, I can eat one.

It sounds stupid, but it works.

And it has worked for the past 10 years, both to get my weight off and to keep my weight off.

BUT.

That isn't all I do.

2.  The Jillian Factor.

I workout.

At least 5 hours a week.  With at least 3 of those hours being cardio and 2 hours being strengthening/toning.

In a typical week, I run, bike or use my elliptical on Monday, Wednesday and Friday, and on Tuesday and Thursday, I do a combination of 30 Day Shred (30 minutes) and Pilates or Yoga (30 minutes).

Yes, this time around, I am a stay at home mommy who gets nap times to get my workout in.

But that's not to say that you can't workout if you work.

Because I totally did it last time.

And still I managed to train for a half marathon, while still working and being mommy to Little Man.

I just made it a priority.

I would workout for 30 minutes at lunch time and then 30 minutes after dinner.

Or first thing in the morning and then as soon as got home....

You have to be flexible, but you have to make it happen.

3.  Technology.

A little over a year ago, my sister started raving about this weight loss app where she could look up any food ever and log her calories for the day.

I just rolled my eyes at her.

Because I don't count calories.

I count points.

Like I would need that.

BUT.

PEOPLE.

It changed my life.

If you have a smartphone, and you are attempting to lose weight, go to your app store and look up my fitness pal.

It turns out, I was eating way too few calories to lose weight doing the workouts I was doing.

I was netting about 200 calories a day.

No wonder I wasn't losing!

This app keeps me on target with my calories as well as my workouts.

It gives me a much more accurate account of how much I am actually burning during a workout.

Versus how many calories are in the foods I eat.

And I get to be friends with my sister and watch her (she - after 3 kids - just found herself wearing a size 6 again) get down with her bad self.

We root each other on.

However, if you don't have a smart phone, you aren't uninvited to the part.

Oh, no, you don't get out that easily.

You can still log in online and log your foods, workouts, etc.

And if you do, be sure to friend me.

There are so many other things that could be said, but this post doesn't need to drag on forever.

So, please, if you have questions, ask them.

If you need a cheerleader, call me.

If you need a running buddy, I'll make it happen.

If you just wanna see a change, start somewhere.

It's slow, and it's painful, but change doesn't happen without discomfort and you are probably going to need someone to talk you through it.

To help you not give up.

To keep you motivated.

I do.

That's why I am so transparent with my weight.

I want to be accountable to all of you.

I want you to cheer me through my goal.

But I would love nothing more than the opportunity to help cheer you through yours.

So, let's be friends, mkay?

Weekly weigh in: Week 12

I'm so lazy when it comes to blogging these days.

It's actually been 3 weeks since I have said anything about my weight on here.

Which is seriously lame.

But, in the past 12 weeks, I have lost 16.8 lbs.

Some weeks were big.

Some weeks like this last one, were not. 

But all in all, they have gotten me here - smaller, lighter, and well on my way.

I am spitting distance from the halfway mark and if that doesn't get a momma moving, nothing will.

I've had a lot of people ask me what I'm doing to get the weight off, and I promise to post a general post soon about how I'm losing this weight, but for now, here's a check in since my last weigh in post.

Week 9, brought me to my first size 12 jeans of the year.

They were tight and uncomfortable, but they were size 12's that would zip, so SUCCESS!

Week 10 took me down .8 to 165.6

And in week 10, I saw a tremendous reduction in MASS, overall.

As in, woah!  Forreals, people.

Then came week 11.

Week 11 was a HUGE week on the scale.

Huge is obviously a relative term considering that I haven't lost more than 2 pounds a week since I started this go around.

During week 11, I dropped 2.8 lbs!!!

That's a new record for this momma!  

I was stoked.

I was just sure I had hit my stride.  

That new and exciting weight loss weeks were going to be in my future from here on out.

That I would be in the 150's by the end of week 12.

But, alas.

Week 12 brought with it the meager .6 lb loss.

And that was after I stepped on the scale a good 5 times and removed every stitch of anything that could possibly add weight to my body.

To say I was disappointed, would be somewhat of an understatement.

But then, just for kicks and giggles, I did my before and after pic.

People.

If you are on a weight loss journey and you aren't doing before and after shots or side by sides, stop what you are doing this very second and take a before shot.  

Then proceed with afters.

Talk about an encouragement.

The change is real.

It is evident.

Even when it doesn't show on the scale.

It shows.

Obviously, my new goal for the upcoming week is to kick myself into high gear and hit the 150's.

Alas, since I will be without access to my scale until next Monday, I won't be posting a weigh in post this week.

So my goal for next week is to hit the 20 lb. mark.  I want to be half way there, already!  

I want to be down to 157 before week 15.  

I know I can do it, I believe I can do it, and I relish the humiliation that awaits me if I don't!

Wish me luck!!

From 30,000 Feet

I'm currently sitting on a plane.

Flying home from Texas.

Funny, we weren't planning to go to Texas.

We were planning to go to Delaware.

But then our flight got canceled and with 2 hours to spare, we decided on Friday that we would go visit Techy's sister.

In Texas.

W fly by the seat of our pants.

Most literally.

What a weekend!

Pretty sure I gained 10 lbs with all the eating.

And lounging.

But now, here I sit, with a poorly behaving 2 year old next to me, a tired and cranky Techy next to him and a very curious (read: nosy) baby girl on my lap.

We've been up since 3:30.

A.M.

We drove an hour and a half to the air port, with about 30 minutes till take off.

Then we stood in the security line for 30 minutes, until a random airport employee came and pulled us out of line and ran us to our flight.

I was literally the.last.person.on.the.plane.

And now, I'm sitting in front of crude cat lady listening to her recount tales of her crazy cats sprinkling in as many expletives as possible.

People.

It was soooooooo worth it.

Well, I'm always runnin, always runnin behind...

It's time.

Time for me to admit.

I am just too busy for my blog.

We (read: I) offered my house as host house for a baby shower in a few weeks.

And need I remind you how much work my house needs???

Um, seriously???

But it serves the purpose of forcing us to settle.  Fast.

Techy hates me right now.

But in 3 weeks, when he can go out on the back porch and sit in his new-to-him lawn furniture while he's grilling his Ball Park, he'll be saying my name with a sigh....

And a thank you.

And while I'm fantasizing, with a palm leaf and a bowl of grapes while he's massaging my feet and telling me that I am the ultimate wife, mother, housekeeper.

And then, and only then, will I post pics of all my progress.

hahahahahahahahhahahahahahah

Not really, I am storing up boatloads of posts for the three of you who still care about what's going on here.

For the record, all this work is really doing things for my dairy-air.  (read: butt, aka. junk in the trunk, aka. booty, aka. derriere {and you thought I couldn't spell, right})

But if you reallly wanna know what's going on, here's a little glimpse:

A makeover of Techy's office, you can't tell much from these pics, but it went from brick red to light grey.  Talk about a "cool" change.

Alot of sweating.  I moved to GEORGIA, ya'll!!!  It's hot down here!

The inevitable Braves game.  In which I was way more interested in the food than the game.  Shhhhhh!  Don't tell, these people are REALLLY into their sports teams.

What you are seeing here, people, is Techy's wildest dreams coming true.  He's passing the torch, so to speak.  I think he almost cried, ya'll.  It was a big 4th of July.

Family date night at Truett's (sit down Chick-fil-a, be jealous.  I understand...)

And the pinnacle - Techy's lawn furniture.  (Estate sale, ya'll!  A grill, 2 6 seat outdoor dining sets WITH umbrella's and a wrought iron bench for less than $200, he's a happy boy!)


Anyway, I miss you, bloggy friends. 


Hopefully, you can love me despite my lapses.

Because I love you!!!